Who's the Master Detective?
by CallistoLexx
Summary: Set in the Misfits-Verse (graciously loaned to many people by Red Witch), will the ClueBathroom mystery ever be solved?


**As usual, all _X-Men: Evolution_ and _G.I. Joe_ characters belong to Marvel. Althea and Xi belong to Red Witch. Adam and Carly are mine. (If you wanna use them, go ahead. Not sure why you would, but if you want to go ahead. Just let me know so I can read whatever you do to them.) _Clue_ and all it's representations belong to Parker Brothers. This was inspired by; you guessed it, Red Witch's wonderful arguments about why _Clue_ has no bathrooms. I could not resist doing one of my own and giving my theory. And this is where my _Clue_ obsession kicks in. My name is Tiffany and I'm a _Clue_-aholic.**   
  
  


**Who's the Master Detective?**   
  
  


"Found it!" 

Carly's loud shout was heard all throughout the Misfit's home, startling her teammates. 

"What was she looking for?" Lance asked, not sure if he should be happy that the lost item was found. 

"I don't know. She told me but I wasn't paying attention," Adam answered. "It's usually something stupid like a tube of lipstick or a crayon or something. She mentioned something about a Wiffle Ball for Barney, but I think that was something for Christmas." 

"Who wants to play a game?" Carly asked coming down the stairs with a large box. "It took me forever to find it in my stuff, but I did find it. Who's up for _Clue_?" 

This caused Lance to groan. It had gotten to the point where he cringed every time he even heard the game mentioned. 

"There's too many people to play," Todd observed. 

"And that's where you're wrong my little Froggy Buddy. Everyone get their butts in these seats," she ordered setting the reddish-brown box on the kitchen table. "It is time for me to introduce you to the evolution of _Clue_. And that evolution is _Clue: Master Detective_. As the box says, 'More suspects, more weapons, more rooms.' And you know what that means? More fun." 

"How many people can play?" Fred asked. 

"Ten. And there are nine of us here. Ten if 'Daddy' wants to play," she directed with a Cheshire cat grin toward Low Light, who was walking through the room. 

"Stop calling me that!" he snapped before continuing on his way. They could hear him grumbling, "Why'd she have to choose me. I'm here mostly against my will!" 

"Okay, so then it's just nine of us," she said setting up the large game board. "Allow me to explain. Ten suspects, eight weapons, and twelve rooms." 

"But there's thirteen rooms," Xi pointed to the center room. 

"And here's where the rule book comes in handy," the feral grinned. 

"Said rule book is also considered her bible," Adam smirked. 

"_Clue_ is the root of all that is good. You should praise it," she replied, sticking her tongue out at her friend. "Anyway, let me continue. I'll just read the important parts." 

"We know how to play _Clue_," Wanda snapped. "We put our people on their starting spaces…where are the starting spaces?" 

"As I was saying, I'll just read the important parts. _'All tokens are placed in the Cloakroom to start, regardless of the number of players. The murder never occurs in the Cloakroom, it's the thirteenth location.'_" 

"Notice how there's still not a bathroom in this place," Todd griped. 

"Why do we have to go through this every time we play this stupid game?" Lance shouted. "There just isn't, get on with your life." 

"What are you talking about?" Carly asked. 

"There's no bathroom on here and we've always wondered why," Fred explained. "In a bathroom, there are many ways to kill people. Drowning, overdosing…" 

"You know, I never thought about that before," Adam said. "That's a good question. Why isn't there one? It seems strange that these people never need to use the facilities." 

"Yeah, what do they do? Go to the nearest 7-11?" 

"Oh, I can explain why there isn't a bathroom," Carly offered as if it wasn't normal not to know. 

"You can?" the others looked at her in shock, including Lance, who really wanted nothing to do with it all. 

"Yeah. I have three theories. The first is that most people aren't patient enough to kill people in the bathroom. It takes too much effort to drown someone, why bother? There are quicker and more effective ways to get the job done. And poisoning by cough syrup, while possible, would make the victim—in this case Mr. Boddy—very suspicious. He'd probably be able to get in a quick call to 911. It's just very impractical to have the bathroom as an option. The second theory is that all the bathrooms are on the second level—and you know this house has to have a second level, it's not likely that the Boddy family sleeps in the Ball Room—and during this party or whatever, the upstairs was blocked off and people couldn't get up there no matter what…which is pretty inhospitable if the bathrooms are all up there. And the third is just that, like in the movie, the bathroom is just hidden." 

"There was a movie?" Fred asked at the same time as Todd said, "That actually makes sense." 

"Yes it does make sense and yes there was a movie," the feline replied. "You haven't seen it? I'll have to make you watch it some time. It really wasn't given its due. I mean, it can't be easy to make a movie out of a board game and, on the whole, they did a fantabulous job of it. It has an all-star cast. Or, all-star to me, anyway." 

"Well, now that the mystery of the missing bathroom is over with, can we get on with the game?" Lance asked, having a feeling that the game would no longer be torture.   
  
  


**_The End_**   
  
  


**Yes it's short, but I was about to actually start writing turn-for-turn the game play. I thought I should end it before I make a big fool of myself. _Clue: Master Detective_ is a real game (and absolutely wonderful…I didn't even know there was ever a version different than that one until I was at least eight…I'd been playing _CMD_ since I could remember.) And for those that don't know, there really is a movie based on the game. You need to see it. While other kids were watching Disney, I was watching _Clue_. I still watch it at least ten times a year. Everyone has something that comforts them, and that movie is one of mine. Anyway…I think my theories are valid. Don't you?**


End file.
